WITH>FOR

For nearly 20 years I worked in the family glass business downtown Galesburg.  Right on the square.  I loved our location.  
 
I love the sounds. The ringing bells of the Central Congregational church and Knox College’s Old Main… 
 
I love the smells.  The restaurant griddles warming up around lunch.  Depending on which way the wind was blowing I would recognize the smell of coffee roasting at a local coffee shop, or the manure lot of a sale barn. 
 
I love the sights. The fountain in the middle of the circle.  The traffic zipping around the circle. The noise of the traffic and how the first snow of the year always made the busy downtown eerily  quiet.  
 
Sometimes you’d get the perfect combination of snow falling, church bells ringing, and coffee roasting…and for a few minutes, heaven was as close a downtown Galesburg.
 
I love the people.  The Main Street workers watering the hanging plants.  The bankers in their suits.  
 
Nina Mooberry. Nina had to be 100 years old.  She’d walk by our glass shop everyday.  We would save our empty soda cans for her church fundraisers…at least that’s what she told us.  
 
In exchange she’d bake us her famous lemon cake. No icing.  Just a sheet cake.  Every time as if it was the first time we’d heard the story she’d tell us why her cake was so moist… because instead of water in the recipe, she’d substitute it with “Lemon Lime Thoda POP.”  
 
And then there was Sonny. His real name was Gerald.  A black man in his seventies that still delivered the register mail newspaper to the downtown businesses.  Sonny had a smile that would cover 50 percent of his face.  The darkest part of his eyes where also growing white from severe glaucoma. 
 
I don’t know how or when I first met Sonny.  He walked by our shop everyday just before noon with his empty Register Mail paper bag slung over his shoulder.  I think we were loading a truck with plate glass when he stopped on his route to talk. 
He had a severe stutter.  So when he got excited the combination of his big smile and stutter made it nearly impossible to understand him.  Not to discourage his obvious joy we would shake our heads and smile as if we understood and agreed.
 
He lived by himself on the 3rd floor of Whiting Hall right behind the Galesburg Public Library.  But he talked about growing up in a house that used to stand right between the back of our family Glass business and the old Herrington Home, the old Galesburg Orphanage.  
 
He would tell me stories about how sometimes the orphans at the Herrington Home would accidentally kick a ball over the wooden fence that separated his yard from the orphanage. He loved kicking the ball back.  
 
He told me, when he was little…his job was to go into the Willis Steel factory across from what is now Hanson Lumber.  As a little kid he’d go in while it was still dark in the morning and get all of the little coal stoves stoked with new coal so when the workers arrived the factory would be warm.
 
Sonny was mentally challenged to some degree and the stories he would tell and the perspective he had on life indicated that his mother had done all she could to protect him from a cruel world.  
 
Somehow I ended up in his apartment one day. We did a lot of work for Whiting Hall, replacing foggy window units and replacing the balances that would hold these big heavy window sashes in place. 
 
I remember seeing the boxes of hamburger helper piled up on his counter. The burnt crusty pots and pans still dirty in the sink.
 
After that, when he would come by our shop on the square delivering his papers if I was in the middle of lunch, I’d offer to share half of my sandwich. He always accepted.  Occasionally, I’d  buy him is own meal.  So when he came by we’d chat for a little and I’d just hand him a bag with a meal.  He’d take it, put it in his big newspaper bag and take it to his apartment to eat.
 
Years of this, to the point where it became pretty routine for myself and the other employees to welcome Sonny into our glass shop for a quick story and a snack.
 
Sonny had faith in Jesus.  We did talk about that.  But his faith was simple and probably no deeper than “Jesus loves me this I know…for the Bible tells me so” or at least whatever he could remember from his mother’s influence.  But Sonny inspired me.  On my worst days I’d see him walk by with that smile and say, if he can smile at what life has given him…what am I complaining about?
 
One day I got the brilliant idea that I should invite Sonny over to our house for dinner.  I don’t know why I didn’t start a little smaller with just a simple midweek casual dinner.  But for whatever reason, I invited Sonny over for Christmas brunch.  Jena and My parents responded kindly but they had to be a little in shock that we would invite Sonny to invade our very private family Christmas tradition.
 
By this time Sonny was no longer delivering papers.  He’d tripped a few times and because of his limited eyesight.  I’d heard rumors he had walked out in front of a few cars and the Register-Mail had received some calls from concerned citizens.
 
I remember taking my oldest son and going on Christmas Day to pick Sonny up at his Whiting Hall apartment.  Back then you had to go to the back of the building to a little lobby and pick up the phone and dial his room number. He came down.  He was dressed up… a little. He was nervous.  He was leaving the security that his mother had taught him to trust and he was taking a risk.
 
So Sonny wouldn’t be left out of the Christmas fun, my kids had purchased some gifts and wrapped them.  Sonny was 78 in this picture (see photo)…he passed away recently at the age of 90.  Even in this photo I can feel his nervousness in his countenance.  Clara is giving him one of 3 gifts.  He received new socks, deodorant and a pocket knife for Christmas that year.
 


Here’s where I’m headed with his story. I believe for many years Sonny got to a point in his life where he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was “for” him. 
He knew that I would do things “for” him.  
I would buy lunch “for” him. 
He maybe would even go by our Glass shop and look at the sign on the building and feel at an organizational level,  “That place… is ‘for’ me.”
 
But something shifted in Sonny’s heart and mind when we…
Helped into our truck. 
Drove him to our home.
Helped him up the steps.
Ate together at our table … Sonny experienced a family that was “with” him. 
 
Sonny made some choices a few days after that Christmas Day that would put him in closer proximity to   people so he could be “with” others for his final years.
 
It makes me wonder, If it was good enough for God to just be “for” us, He wouldn’t have needed to promise and provide Immanuel. “God with us”.  
 
Consider this statistical take on the life of Jesus, the life we have to model.
 
Jesus spent 30 years seemingly doing nothing. 3 years working with a motley crew of disciples, and then a couple of days near the end of his life fixing something that was broken.
 
But 99% of his life was just being “with”. The 3 years of his ministry was just being “with”.  Even the few days “fixing” was so his creation could be “with” him in eternity.
 
Immanuel.  God with us.
 
“For” is safer.
“With” is risky.  Jesus understood this.
 
There is nothing wrong with “for”. We need to be “for”…more.  
 
For is great.  
 
With… is greater.
 
With > For 
 
I believe the reality of “Immanuel”, God with us, absolutely changes the way we understand and live out the Gospel.  It changes the way we view discipleship. It changes the way we understand our relationship with Jesus and the way we understand our relationship with the people we are closest to and the people we think are most unlike us.  
 
This understanding could turn a church budget upside down. 
It will change what Christmas presents you buy.
It will change the boundaries you set for yourself in terms of technology.
It will change the way you parent…the way you grandparent.
If the right people got a hold of this, It could change government policy.  
 
 
Who knows, it might change where we live or who we have over for dinner.
Or maybe, the way we finish out our lives. 
 
With > For
 
My single challenge for us is to allow this reality to simply invade every part of our lives for the next few days until Christmas.
 
Maybe it’s a conversation starter.  Asking your kids what would it look like to embrace this as an expression of our family this season. 
 
Take an action step.
Do an experiment. 
Visit an old friend or make a new one. 
 
With > For 
 
Do you remember Sonny?  How about Nina?  What are you going to do with this reality this Christmas?
 

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